Let’s talk about Shrek: The Musical again.

By far my favorite song in the show is “Who I’d Be” which takes place (quite a few story beats before “When Words Fail,” which I wrote about recently) right after Shrek and Fiona meet for the first time and escape the tower. Shrek sings about who he would be if he could choose something different for himself.

He imagines being a Viking, or a knight. But mostly, he wants to be a hero. The kind of hero that finds love and acceptance–two things he’s never had. In one verse, he says:

Or else I’d be a poet, and write a different story–one that tells of glory, and wipes away the lies. Into the skies I’d throw it; the stars would do the telling. The moon would help with spelling, and night would dot the I’s.

He paints a wonderful picture of what he would want for himself, but always modifies it by saying he knows it’s not possible, with lines like “but not for me” and “an ogre’s fate is known.”

Shrek (the musical particularly, but the animated film, as well) is about the journey to reclaim, or find, the power to write his own story and not just play out the story that society has written for him, and “Who I’d Be” encapsulates that beautifully.

I love this song because we see that Shrek still has the ability to imagine something different–something better–for himself, but he doesn’t really believe (in this moment of the play) that he has control over his story.

This theme plays out with pretty much all the other characters–from Fiona to the fairytale squad that invades Shrek’s swamp. The first time we meet Fiona, for example, she sings about how she’s just waiting for her story to move forward (a theme which I’ve written about previously), and how it is supposed to end–clearly feeling that it’s already been written. Already decided. The idea is everywhere in the musical: characters feeling stuck in the story of their lives, and trying to find ways to take control of it.

I think the question of not only who gets to write our story, but also how much of it is already locked in, is one that we can all relate to. After all, we like to tell kids they can be anything they want, and we like to believe in the “American dream,” but it’s hard to make the case that you have enough control to write your own life story when basic facts like your childhood zip code are so highly correlated with educational opportunities, economic opportunities, life span, and other life outcomes.

Shrek’s resignation resonates with me, because I’ve felt it. I’ve felt that doubt, wondering if I have the ability to make the life that I want for myself (or if anyone does).

This is an issue that gets sticky quickly. I would never claim that we have complete control and can 100% create the life we want. Nor would I argue that we have no control and are merely playing out a story that has already been written for us by fate or the stars or what-you-will. I think the answer, as with most things, lies somewhere in the middle. I don’t know exactly where. Perhaps there’s not really an answer at all.

If I see myself in Shrek’s resignation, I see myself in his imagination, too, and that’s where I find hope. Whether or not I can create the life I want, at least I can see it. And I suppose that’s a start.

In the words of JK Rowling: “We do not need magic to transform our world. We carry all the power we need within ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better.”